Self-Worth with Jaclyn Steele

Why your self-image determines your trajectory in life

March 02, 2022 Jaclyn Steele Season 3 Episode 107
Self-Worth with Jaclyn Steele
Why your self-image determines your trajectory in life
Show Notes Transcript

Let's be real.  How many of us focus on regularly elevating the thoughts we have about ourselves?  Or on how we speak to ourselves about our bodies?  Our careers?  Our families? Our self-image is a key component to how we show up in the world and it is a key component in our level our self-worth. I would go as far as to say, our self-image determines our trajectory in life.  And here's why...

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Hi, I am Jaclyn Steele and welcome to self discovery. Howard Thurman so beautifully wrote, don't ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive? And go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive, coming alive. That my friends is what self discovery is all where that man Well, hello, everybody and happy Wednesday to you welcome to this episode of self discovery soon to be self worth with Jaclyn Steele yes, we're still doing the name change my Well, let me just say, I since the last time I have talked to you guys, since I batched a few episodes, I've had a baby. I have a son, he is now three weeks old. His name is Roman, Wilder steel Thurmond. And he is just the love of my life. And if I keep talking about him, I'm going to cry and turn into a puddle of happy tears. So I'm not going to do that. But I will say next episode, I think it's next episode that I have it scheduled for, I am going to talk about my son and just the transition into motherhood and what my birth experience was like to keep you guys posted on those personal things. I think it's always interesting. Specially for podcasts that I follow when the person who hosts the podcast shares their personal stories in their personal life. It's just such a connective thing we're all so so. So human and sharing our human experiences binds us together. So that's my intention. If you do want to know more about baby and all that stuff, that episode will be coming out I think next week. Today though, we are going to talk about why your self image determines your trajectory in life. This season. As I've said, I'm introducing a theme of the month and for March, the theme is self image. I want to speak with you about self image because I believe it's one of the most important elements to elevating our self worth. Our self image is how we see ourselves how we speak to ourselves, how we think about ourselves. dictionary.com defines self image as the idea, conception, or mental image one has of oneself. And that's really big stuff, right? But how often do we push aside the value of how we see ourselves? Let's be real. How many of us focus on regularly elevating the thoughts we have about ourselves, or how we speak to ourselves about our bodies, or our careers, or our families. Our self image is a key component to how we show up in the world. And it is a key component in our level of self worth. I would go as far as to say our self image determines our trajectory in life. And here's why. How we see ourselves determines what kind of opportunities we put our hat in the ring for whether or not we're going to show up at that pool party sporting a swimsuit, right? All the women who are listening know what that feels like, determines how we speak in public, how we show up online and what we do or don't share the frequency on which we live high or low, or somewhere in between or just the the way we show up in our relationships. Whether we show up with authority or as a victim, the way we eat, the way we treat our body is the things we spend money on or don't spend money on. The books we read the television we watch the resources and energies we are or are not willing to allow into our lives. You get my drift here, right? How we see ourselves subconsciously determines how we walk in this life. If you don't think that you are worthy of that promotion, you aren't going to apply for it. If you don't think you're smart enough to start your own business. You aren't going to take that first step If you have a real constantly playing in your head, that your body isn't good enough, you aren't going to go on that beach vacation or that pool party, your heart really wants to go to. If you feel like you dress like a Frump, then you will most likely act like a Trump. This isn't rocket science. And you guys, if you're listening to this, I know how intelligent you are. But understanding our self image requires that we create awareness around it. And you guys know, I love examples. So I'm going to give a couple of examples of how this has played out for me, specifically how it played out for me a few years ago, I remember I was in the beginning stages of working from home. I thought it was the bee's knees, which it is. And I worked only in comfy clothes. I rarely put on makeup. And I didn't give to you know what about how my hair looked? In my mind at the time, I was just sitting alone in my office in front of my computer, who cares what I look like, right? Well, so funny how this works, but several months of this. And I started to notice changes in my behavior. It was subconscious at first, and then I created awareness around it and realize what was happening. I started not wanting to leave the house because it would require that I get ready. I didn't want to post on social media, because it would require that I make myself look presentable. And it doesn't always require that but you guys know what I'm saying. And I didn't want to take client meetings because I started to feel self conscious about showing up in public because I was becoming a recluse. The way I was dressing and looking was directly affecting my self image. I looked like a Frump. And I certainly felt like a Frump. When I realized this, I thought, well, I can change my behavior. I don't have to wear business clothes. But I can wear jeans and cool sweater and boots all day. I can put on makeup and brush my hair and make myself feel like I want to show my face. And I did. And I still go super casual sometimes. But more often than not I get ready every day. It makes me feel like I can take on the world. It makes me feel like I'm honoring my body and respecting myself. This simple simple change changed my energy, like big time, it changed the wave of the frequency I was riding on. For example, I started showing up more online and all these opportunities I wasn't even looking for popped up. When I dress nicely. It makes me want to eat well and work out and continue to look nice. It's a perpetuating cycle. And when I act and speak in a way that reflects how I'm feeling, it makes me want to go after more opportunities in this world. Is this making sense? I have a feeling that you can relate. Our self image matters. The thoughts we allow ourselves to think matter. The way we dress matters, the way we take care of our bodies matters, the way we feel about how we are perceived matters. Not because it's so important what others think. Not at all. But because it's so important what we think about ourselves. Today's episode is powered by the golden secrets. This incredible skincare line was birthed from the heart and soul of Jessie golden, who if you don't know who she is yet, you should listen to episode 102 of this podcast because I interviewed her and you're going to absolutely fall in love with her I'm telling you. But this line the golden secrets is a holistic, sustainable fair trade, wild harvested and cruelty free skincare and wellness line that wants to inspire rituals of self love and unveil a natural ageless golden glow. It's rooted in nature, ancient wisdom and organic beauty. The Golden secrets is committed to giving back and providing tools for the conscious consumer to live a more balanced, fulfilled beautiful and purposeful life. sound like something you want to be a part of. Yep, me too. The Golden secrets thrives on making skincare and wellness products that benefit everybody. all ethnicities, sexual orientations and specific skincare needs skincare that doesn't harm you or the environment but instead works in harmony to awaken it. Oh, yes, yes, yes. Also every product comes with an affirmation and a QR code so you can quickly learn how to use the product. I love combining affirmations with things we do every day, it transforms something as mundane as putting on your moisturizer into a sacred moment. And if you've been listening to this podcast for any length of time, you know, I'm all about that this line is it's just next level, I have their youth beauty face oil, their aura beauty mist, Sorcerer's Stone guasha beauty tool, gold pulse firming face wand and this sculpting stone guasha body tool. I've also heard rave reviews about the golden secrets heal all oil. So that's next on my list. I use these products pretty much daily. And my gosh, I could go on for days about the benefits of guasha. Which if you buy any of their guasha tools, you get a giant ebook chock full of info on how to use it, and why it's so transformative. And why the stone specifically, the composition of the stone is so important. It's not like other guasha tools at all. I'm also so in awe of the youth beauty face oil, it immediately absorbs into your skin, it plumps it up, it gives you this golden glow, and the aura mist penetrates your skin and locks in moisture five times better than hyaluronic acid. Guys, it's a total game changer, especially if you live in the desert like me. And in addition, this might be my favorite product. Although it's really hard to say the gold pulse firming face wand not only feels amazing, it helps a race the tiny Forehead Wrinkles I have I've watched in all multiple times in the mirror as those little bad boys disappear as I use this tool. I cannot recommend this slide enough it is next level on every level. So do yourself a favor and go to the Golden secrets.com or follow the link in the show notes and use code Jacqueline 10 for 10% off your order. Again, code Jaclyn 10 will get you 10% off your order, all the information is in the show notes. You are going to love every product he tried from the golden secrets, I just know it. So if you find you are in a place right now, where you are struggling with self image, here are a few things that you can experiment with. And these are things that have changed the way that I see myself. washing my face, brushing my teeth, putting on a little makeup and dressing in a way that feels self expressive. Meaning I dress the way I want to feel another thing moving my body because it builds my self confidence, creating awareness around how I speak to myself. If I am on a negative loop, recognizing that and then doing what it takes to bring a higher frequency into my day and into that loop. So instead of saying, I feel ugly today, replace it with I'm going to do something today that makes me feel beautiful. Sometimes going from I feel ugly to I feel beautiful is too big of a leap for our brain. So we have to think in baby steps when we are changing the way we speak to ourselves. I like to use the phrase and I had this post in my RV when I was doing the RV Life. Choose the loving thought. It's an awesome mantra to continue to come back to over and over again. Choose the loving thought. Like right now, I could be like, Whoa, my body is all out of sorts because I had a baby. And I don't like these changes. Or I can say my body just created a miracle. And now it's finding a new equilibrium. My body does so much for me and it deserves my patience. A few more things that you can experiment with to potentially change the way you see yourself. Be cognizant, or this is what I did. I tried to cultivate being cognizant about what I was feeding my mind or what I am feeding my mind. The books I read the shows I watch the podcast As I listen to the people I hang out with and interact with, how do I feel after that interaction or after consuming that content? Again, being aware about the people that you're spending your time with, or the people that you're doing business with, do they feel high vibe to you? Or do they decrease the vibe? I am 35 years old. I just had a baby. I'm at a point right now, where I only only have room for high frequencies in my life. Why? Because the way I see myself demands high frequency. Another thing, making time to do things that honor myself that honor yourself walks tiebreaks, basking in the sun, just for fun. Throwing the ball to my dog facials, massages, float tank time, magnesium baths, guasha, acupuncture, etc. Rituals, even if they're 235 10 minutes, rituals that allow me to sink into the present moment and rejoice in the woman I am. And in the woman I am becoming another thing, buying things that bring me joy. This doesn't mean that they're expensive, be a $10 candle. It means being aware of something that really sparks that feeling of joy. And allowing myself to have it without guilt. Like I said, could be a $10 candle candles or something that bring me so much pleasure. Are they necessary? No. But do they bring me joy and increase my frequency when I sit at my desk and light one every day? 100% last thing that I'm going to touch on saying no. When I really want to say no. Same goes for you saying no. When you really want to say no. Having excellent boundaries with people and clear communication. Gosh, this is hard. And sometimes it can feel like we're being unkind. But what I have found is that the kindest way to be is clear. And to have good boundaries. So let's say someone wants you to attend an event, and you actually really want to go, but you know that you're tired and you need to keep some energy in the tank. You can say, Yes, I'll be there. But I can only stay an hour. I love the nuances of getting into the details of my communication with people. The reason I love this is because I used to fire off like a yes or no. So, so fast. And then I would deal with the ramifications of whether or not I actually wanted to participate. And now, before I answer yes or no, I do a gut check. And I asked myself, do I actually want to do this? What is the opportunity cost? What is the energy cost? And if I'm not feeling it, I honor that you have full permission to do the same. Same goes with text message communication, email communication, social media messages, communication. We are in this modern world. So available all the time, or it appears we are so available all the time, we're only an email away a direct message away a text message away. But if we don't have the energy to keep up with all of the stuff that is coming in our direction, we don't have to we can say hey, I'm not up for a conversation today. Hey, I know you call me but I'm not at a point right now where I have enough energy to call you back. Or if somebody is just trying to get into contact with you and they're sucking your energy you also don't have to respond. And me five years ago, felt responsible for everybody's feelings and then allowed myself to be in the backseat of my own life and my own energy. The me today the self worth infused self worth on the path to recovery and healing me says, Hey, I'm worthy of listening to my heart in this moment, I'm worthy of checking in and going, do I have energy to have this conversation? I'm worthy of asking myself, do I have what it takes to invest in this relationship right now. And if I don't, as hard as it is, I'm honest about it. Because I believe that's the kindest, most integrity filled way we can show up. So I could go on and on and on about self image. But for now, I think what I touched on is a great start. Not only is self image how we see ourselves, but it's how we treat ourselves. And if you want to change the trajectory of your life, I cannot recommend enough starting with how you see and treat yourself first, your self image. I know that you can do this. But if at any point you feel overwhelmed, just repeat the mantra, choose the loving thought. This is my backbone mantra. And it reminds me that I can always, always, always be returning to love and specifically to self love. High self love equals high self image. And you my friends are beyond worthy of a high self image right now. Just as you are in this very moment.